Life is complicated

I am home for the day. I was home yesterday and got a lot done, I hope it continues, but today I struggle with motivation.
I have been struggling with motivation for a very long time.
I'm not really comfortable discussing my deepest personal feelings at this time.
I'll just tell everyone that I am doing fine and am getting the help I need. I have been dealing with the same struggles for awhile, it is now that I am seeing them more clearly in a way that I can deal with them.
I am very fortunate to have a supportive husband, a great son, who seems to make any cloud disappear with his smile, and a good friend who showed up at the right time. Now the good friend showed up because Dustin drove me to her office to see her and we set up some girl time, but whatever works.
I realize that I am starting an ongoing process of selfdiscovery. I'm a bit scared. Is everyone sometimes scared to learn the truth about themselves? About what is driving them? I'm a bit nervous to see the truth about my insecurities and face them. I have pretty easily buried them for a long time. I need to start being honest about my feelings and find better ways to express them.
I just know that I use to be a happy, confident woman and I wasn't afraid to take on the world. I feel that part of me slipping away. I have been living as a woman without hope.
As I threw up the desperate prayer Help me! There seemed to be a small voice that said, "it doesn't have to be this way, you can get the help you need, but you need to go forward."
It was like I woke up.
It has still been hard. I have been giving Dustin my list of what I have to do, I need someone to keep me accountable, even with little things. But, I feel that I am going in the right direction.
There is hope out there. Even a small pinpoint, but it is there.