Feeling sorry for myself! And other stuff.

So, I was ready for bed at about 9:30, but I was trying to stay up a bit later so I wouldn't screw my sleep up. Now, 11:00 and I'm nowhere near ready to sleep. I'm having a little pity party, so now you are invited.
The day really was great until the end. It amazes me how a day can be completely wonderful and then go down hill in a matter of hours.
This morning, I skipped church and instead went to town to meet up with Dustin for breakfast. I figured God would understand my desire to spend time with my husband since we don't know when he gets to come home. He is supposed to get to come home tomorrow, but with the blizzard coming, he easily could get stuck in town. That is actually why I am feeling sorry for myself, but I'll get there.
I had breakfast with Dustin at the Depot, yummy. We went for a drive. He had a meeting at noon. I stayed at the shop because I had to wait until wal-mart opened. I keep figuring out stuff that will make organizing our house and new bedroom easier, it's been fun, but I'm spending way too much money. Still fun.
After Dustin's meeting, I met up with him and a couple of his coworkers for lunch.
After lunch, I wandered wal-mart. I found some bamboo drawer organizers that I'm going to love. A new lamp for next to the bed, because I found out last night that the one I was going to use isn't bright enough. The new one is perfect. I got new down alternative pillows for the bed, some of ours are shot. I also found a great sheer lip gloss/conditioner (it's moisturizing and pretty all at the same time) and a great sheer nail polish (It's a very natural pink, but makes my fingers look better and I know it will be better for my nails.)
Got home. Got good news on the mom front, which I am thankful for. Mom is fine. The angiogram showed no blockage whatsoever. They don't know what caused the chest pain, but her heart is fine. She is now at home and I know very thankful to be there.
I spent most of the day on the couch or in the recliner. I was feeling very blah. Ian has been sticking his foot underneath my ribs all day and it has made me very uncomfortable. I can make him move them, but then two minutes later he decides that's where they belong. I've had a headache. blah blah blah. So I have watched a lot of TV and napped. I just lacked motivation and I don't feel bad about it one bit. I did fix a door and changed shower curtains in the bathroom. Good enough as far at progress goes.
What really got me was the end of the day. I realized at about 10:30 that I should check the corn hopper for the funace. That's when I realized. I have enough until tomorrow, but if the blizzard hits as big as they think it will, it will be very difficult for me to get more.
So, I had to start the toyota and haul corn. That is when I started to have my pity party.
I know what Dustin does is important. I know that it helps people and he is needed. But tonight. I just wanted to have him here taking care of me. Here I am, 8 months pregnant, hauling corn and knowing a blizzard is coming and I'm alone. I just want to cry.
I know dustin knows this feeling. There were times in parish life where I would be gone a lot and home late every night an he eventually would just say, "is it my turn yet?" Well, that's how I feel. When is it my turn? I know that he is doing what is right. I know that I can take care of myself. I just don't want to right now.
So, I know I am completely feeling sorry for myself, but sometimes, you just can't help it.
There is a blizzard on the way. I-94 is already closed from Mandan west to the Montana border. The snow should be getting here in the next hour or so. We are in the predicted area to get 6-10 inches. That's another reason I am feeling bad. Dustin was going to get to come home in the morning, now, I don't think he'll be able to get here. I'll be fine, but lonely. So, maybe the pity party will continue, maybe it won't. Time will tell. Now, I know that if I need help, my in-laws are close and some neighbors are even closer if I would need them, but I want Dustin home. I'll be fine, I just wish I was better.
Well, I think I should go to bed. If I get a good night sleep, things will look better in the morning, they usually do with daylight. even if it is snowing, cold and windy daylight.

Lots done, but I miss my hubby!

So, Dustin's return to our house is unknown at this time. It really depends on flooding. If there are emergency refugees from the flooding in Fargo and it also depends on the flooding that will arrive in Jamestown in about 2 weeks.
We thought he might get to come home tomorrow, but it seems very unlikely now. I'm a little annoyed that he was going to call me back in a few minutes and that was about 2 hours ago. I was going to go into town in the morning to meet him for breakfast, but he had to call me back to finalize a time. Grrrrr. So, I may go into town in the morning.
I won't go to church, the roads to get there are not in great condition yet. I may go to church in Jamestown for something different. We'll see.
My MIL came over today and helped me clean. We did a lot and slowly I am reclaiming my house as a livable dwelling. I sat in my living room tonight and it didn't make me tired.
(Okay, Dustin just called, he's off the hook since he was on a transfer)
Anyway. I'm really happy with how much we got moved, cleaned, organized, thrown. There's a long way to go, but it is sooooooo much better.
Well, it's late and I need my sleep.

OB appointment

So, I had my weekly OB checkup today. The updates. I am effacing. I am not dilated at all. So, no big surprises.
My blood pressure is up a little bit, but no one is worrying too much yet. We'll see how it is next week.
I won't be having this baby any time soon. I guess it isn't time yet, I'm okay with that. Whatever the baby wants.
Dustin had a meeting at 2:00. I'm waiting for him to get back and then we'll go to wal-mart.
I have a meeting tonight with a couple, so that should be fun. I'm missing stuff for the meeting, but we'll get together anyway and go from there.
Baby is pretty active today, I am exhausted, so I guess we are even. I will be happy to go home and sleep tonight.
In other news. We have another skunk. This time in our yard. We have caught it in a live trap. Dustin will blow his brains out when he gets home tomorrow morning. He won't likely spray until then. He is covered and they don't really like spraying on themselves. There has been way too much skunk drama this year. Enough to last me for a lifetime. Stupid polecats.
So, there is the update on life as I see it.
baby soon, but not now.
skunks must be destroyed.
I wish I had time for a nap. I need one.
I also bought a $7 ring at target. I'm tired of looking like an unwed mother because I can no longer wear my wedding ring. So, I got a fake. A really gawdy fake. I love it!

Crazy life!

So, a lot has happened since I was going to post photos. The room is done. The carpet is done. The carpet installer finished the steps yesterday. I spent yesterday putting the clothes in the closet and also getting the washed baby stuff put away. It was really fun for me. Dustin had to come into town yesterday because the ambulance had to send a crew to Fargo for evacuations. He stayed in Jmst. to cover. Last night Dustin called me into town. Fargo is having a lot of evacuations and so Dustin and I are in Jmst waiting for instructions for the ambulance service.
A crew went last night and we thought maybe more would be sent, so I came into town to help, at least cover phones if it was needed. I really can't be in a truck because I can't lift. Dustin and I shared a twin bed, interesting, but surprisingly, we both fit.
I will run to my OB appt. in a couple minutes and we'll go from there. I can't believe we are so close! It's insane, but it might be time too. I saw a bald eagle yesterday, the last time I saw one I found out I was pregnant the next day. So, maybe Julie H is right. They are a predictor. It would be better if we didn't have the baby this week, but I suppose the baby is the one to decide.
My mom is in the hospital. She had chest pain yesterday, so the doc kept her. She'll have an angiogram in GF eventually. I'll talk to her later this morning to find out specifics.
Well, there is where we are at.
All my love to Linda K and family as they prepare and continue to fortify and build up their dike. Prayers to all my friends in Fargo and prayers for all those I don't know effected by this. May the water recede.

No Camera! No Pictures!

Sorry for no pictures today. Dustin took the camera to work in order to show them remodel off. I didn't get them downloaded before he left, so he better bring it back tomorrow or he's in big trouble!
The room looks fabulous! I really can't believe how great it is looking. It it beyond what we thought it could be. It really makes us want to get the rest of the house up to where we want it. I think after a rest we'll be anxious to start another project. After the carpet, there is some downstairs that we had to rip up to get the stairs in for the bedroom and so that room will now be opened up some and finished into a dining area. We have been wanting a place for a kitchen table for awhile, so this will be great when we start to wrap up and I can buy some more furniture.
My parents left about an hour ago. They stopped by this morning and finished up some varnshing and then they took off. I am finishing up mudding the stairwell. It should be ready for texture when I am done. I have done a really good job, even if I do say so myself.
The rest of the day will be spent on cleaning and picking up. Hopefully getting our house a little closer to respectable again. I can't wait until this mess is over!

The closer I am to fine.

The title of the Indigo Girls song seems to express my mood tonight best.
Mom and dad varnished for me most of the day. The varnish was too much for me, so I instead mostly did laundry in the basement. I got quite a bit done. I have one load left in the dryer and one in the washer. I'll definitely get the dryer one folded, but I'm not sure about what's in the washer moving to the dryer.
I also got some of the baby clothes washed. I feel a little ahead of the game with that one today. Yay for me.
I am in awe of the fact that we are looking at about a month to my due date. Baby turned back to proper position today. Head down, butt in the air. I can tell because I can't feel the head and butt on each side of my abdomen. Right now. Feet are again kicking up, I can feel the butt at the top of my stomach and I've got the worst heartburn. The baby is still lower, I can tell because I can still breath fairly well. I can't believe we are at this stage already. In a week and a half I will be at 37 weeks, which means that the baby could come any time and I would be considered full term. CRAZY.
I am starting to feel more calm and panicked at the same time. I am feeling like in the next days, I'll be able to start putting the house back together and I can start to get ready for our son. I also am panicking because...Did I mention we are getting ready to meet our son?!?!
There are going to be so many changes and they are going to happen so quickly. I thought we'd be ready by now, but I also know that we won't be ready...ever! We will do what first time parents have always done. Tried to prepare as best as they could and then...wing it. We'll do the best we can.
So, as life goes, I'm closer to fine. We're getting there anyway.
Tomorrow, we get the carpet. I'll hopefully finish mudding the drywall in the stairwell and maybe by evening we can prime it. After primer...we have texture and paint. I will be so proud of us if we have it done before the carpet installer. That might move me past fine and move me onto spendid.
I have more pictures that I will have to get downloaded one of these days. More pictures of the remodel. I will have pictures of the room with furniture in it soon.
I also have some pictures of baby stuff. My mom made a quilt and finished another preprinted blanket that I had bought. She also brought a crocheted afghan that was mine when I was a baby. It's yellow and it came with matching booties. It's pretty cute. I also might show some of the great clothes that I just picked up. These things make me closer to fine too.
I'm not very philosophical. I do know that this is a nice corner to turn. Fine. In the midst of all the chaos that has been swirling around us. Fine sounds pretty good. I'm glad I'm this much closer. I might even be there already.

The week (or why I might go crazy and yet be thankful at the same time.)

I am home today, Dustin is stuck working for most of the week. This is not convenient since the carpet guy comes on Monday to install the carpet.
My parents came to help yesterday, before we knew the entire schedule problem. I am directing the chaos, but it really is a bit stressful. Dustin was a bit testy last night. I had to go to a class, so I didn't get home until late.
I ordered the blinds for the bedroom today. Some will come right away, I had to custom order a few and those will be 5 weeks. Please refrain from looking through those windows for the next month or two.
My dad put up some drywall in the stairwell and I believe has started mudding it. We'll see how that goes, it is not his talent.
My mom is varnishing and staining. I am sanding the endcaps for the stairs.
This will get done, but it is driving me crazy.
We are going to church tonight, so it will be a early night, which is nice.
In other news. My Toyota is in the shop again. An unrelated problem to the engine, but showed up after the new engine. Another $400 and then I shall be mobile again.
I had an OB appointment yesterday. Baby is doing awesome. He was laying horizontally lately, but the doctor is not worried about it yet, so I refuse to. The baby has been moving a lot yet, so I know that baby has been head down some too.
My blood pressure is up a bit, but not bad. 136/80. I'm not concerned. My systolic has been in the 120 range most of the time.
Next week I go back and will go back once a week until I have the baby.
It's very exciting to be this close.
My parents brought the cradle this visit, so I'm excited to get the bedroom set up so I can the the other baby stuff set up. This is fun!
In other news. We went to prenatal classes at the hospital Monday. Um. My husband is a medic, I'm an EMT. This class was not helpful. I actually wanted to go mostly for the breathing exercises, but she wasn't good at teaching them, so it was a waste of a good night of work on the house. Oh well. We may go back next week. We'll tour the labor and delivery unit. That wouldn't be bad. The next part is infant cpr. We're both CPR certified, so maybe we'll leave when we get to that part.
I better get back to work.

The baby dropped or (why my pants don't fit!).

The baby turned a few weeks ago. He is now head down, which is good since that is the position you want him to come out. Anyway, the baby dropped down. This means that since the baby is lower, I can breath a bit easier. It also means that my weight has shifted. So, the maternity jeans that I bought because my early pregnancy maternity jeans no longer fit. Now, they don't fit. I'm back to my slightly snug early pregnancy maternity jeans. I can't win. It really doesn't matter. I am thankful for my bella band which has made holding up whatever pants I want to wear up.
Dustin had to sing and play for a funeral this morning. I went into town with him and while he went to the funeral. I went to the thrift stores and bought some baby clothes. I did really well for my 2o bucks. I got some great stuff.
Eric came out and finished wiring this afternoon. My MIL came and varnished woodwork for us.
I have been having braxton hicks contractions for frequently now, so I did that a couple times today. They weren't the painful ones I usually have, I am assuming that they are like the ones the pregnancy books talk about. Mine haven't really followed that description. Mine have been painful. Dustin almost brought me in the other day because they were bad and got really close together, but they stopped, so we were fine.
Well, we are going to church tomorrow, so I will turn in and say goodbye for now. Good night

Beautiful Day!

It was absolutely gorgeous out today. I opened the windows to enjoy some of the fresh air. I was up in the bedroom doing some work. I have the balusters stained. Dustin or someone else will have to do the varnishing, the fumes aren't something I can handle. I took Dustin out to eat tonight at the bar in town. He had the walleye and I had the steak. It was really yummy. After that we went to our neighbor CG's house to visit and had icecream. It was a nice evening.
We got home and figured a few things out with the stairs. Now we decided to go to bed early. We got up around 6:am today and it was a good way to start, so we'll try that again tomorrow.
Dustin plays at a funeral in the morning, so I am going to go to town with him so I can do some shopping while he is there. It has been a great day.
Did anyone else notice that it is 5 weeks until the baby comes. Crazy. I can't believe it. We might actually be ready at the rate we are going. I hope so.

The storm is over, but baby it's cold outside!

I always feel like some of the days following a blizzard feel like a hangover. A weather hangover. I kinda wonder around in a stupor and wonder if I really have to go back to living. I don't want to go out there. I did take some garbage out this morning, but that's as far as I have ventured. To do that I bundled up tight and warm.
I will get pics posted soon. I have a few to take today and then maybe I can get them all up. The changes are really big in the last days. Paint. Lighting. Staining. Door hung and stained. It is quite exciting.
Today will involve some more staining of woodwork. Dustin will work on finishing the stair trim and toe boards. I'll work on some stain.
It seems like the deadline is getting really close. Carpet layer, baby. We need to get moving.
Well, I better run for now. The woodwork calls.

Blizzard Day!

Snow day would be an understatment. So, we'll be honest. It's a blizzard out there. I can't believe we are in to march and having the biggest storm of the winter. Last year on this day it was a record high of 52 degrees. What a difference a year makes.
We are both home snug and are working on the attic. Right now, I am waiting for dinner. Dustin is making these cheese biscuit things, yum.
I am sanding woodwork. Dustin is working on day two of the wiring. It started with him cutting a hole in our brand new bedroom ceiling. It can't be helped, a few things weren't done quite right and it is the only way we can make it happen now. It isn't a problem until you can't fix it. We can still fix it, so it isnt' a problem.
Yesterday, I rescheduled my OB appointment. It was supposed to be today and I knew that wasn't going to happen, so now it is next Tuesday. I'm excited to be getting so close, I can't believe how close my due date is getting.
I will try to post more remodel pics tomorrow.
Have a nice blizzard day.

Another bad Monday!

I had some great days in the last week, apparently I should have found time to write then because today has sucked. We have spent most of today trying to get the wiring in the bedroom to work and have found that there are a few kinks in the system and now we are not sure how to fix it effectively and easily.
I fell down the basement stairs. I'm okay. I hurt my knee and my arm. Baby is fine. I turned and fell mostly on my butt and knee.
So, we have a night of troubleshooting ahead.
In other news. The interstate is being closed at 7:PM tonight for the biggest storm of the winter. There was a smaller storm for most of the day today and it started with rain, so the freezing on the road caused some motor vehicle accidents. An ambulance even rolled. I'm glad we are home safe and sound. Tomorrow will be a storm day.
Our prenatal class was canceled, so we will continue with our wiring woes.

Productive Monday! Sick Tuesday!

Yesterday was a very productive day. In the morning, Dustin and I went and looked at an airseeder. After the airseeder we grabbed lunch and drove to Bismarck. We did tons of shopping for our remodel. We bought the millwork for the bedroom. Casing, baseboards, stair railing and balusters. We also picked up the paint, stain and varnish for the walls and woodwork. To top it all off, I also got the hanging stairway light. It is absolutely awesome.
The only thing we missed was the ceiling fan, we couldn't find one we liked. We'll have time for that.
We had dinner and our neice jacee met us for dessert. It was a great day...And then it was on the downward slide.
On the way home, Dustin's toe started to hurt. The beginning of gout. By two in the morning, it was really bad. He barely slept and I ended up barely sleeping too. Then, I got a sore throat. Late this morning, I started throwing up. I'm feeling better. I haven't thrown up for several hours, but it feels like I will. Yuck. Hopefully it is just a bug. I'm feeling better. Dustin will be home from work in town soon and said he'd make me some scrambled eggs and toast. Something mild sounds good.
Dustin's foot is feeling better. Hopefully, we will both be well enough to get some work done upstairs.
We are just weeks away from carpeting. YAY. I can't believe how close we are getting.

Sunday Afternoons!

Dustin is napping and I am relaxing on the couch. It is a great Sunday afternoon.
Gracie the puppy is feeling better and wanted to go outside to play, so she is outside running around. Molly is tormenting the cat and sometimes sitting next to me on the couch.
I was studying for my EMT class and that is going very badly. I think I should be able to read some more in the car tomorrow. I'm just not getting things. I think if I keep reading, I should be okay. I am not so sure I should have taken this class at this particular time. I think I may have bit off more than I can chew at my current level of concentration ability. All I really am thinking about lately is getting ready for the baby. Not such a shocker, huh?
This week is full of fun. We are going to look at an air seeder. After that we run to Bismarck to pick up woodwork and paint at Menard's, after that back to Jamestown to go to our first prenatal class at the hospital. That's just Monday!
This week we finish up the walls of the new bedroom. On Saturday my sisters-in-law and one of my nieces are coming to paint, so we need to be ready.
I ordered our new bed yesterday, great fun! I can't wait.
We will call the carpet layer tomorrow to get him scheduled. Hoping two weeks, we'll see what his schedule is.
It is all coming together, it is so much fun.
It is nice to have a light at the end of the tunnel, even if it is just a slight glimmer. I think we have felt like we've been walking in the dark for awhile, just grasping, not seeing the end in sight or even progress to keep us going. Now, I think we can get it done!
It's a good Sunday.